


Calvintale

by Irritated_Fern



Category: Calvin & Hobbes, Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Undertale story with Calvin and Hobbes instead of Frisk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-07-01
Packaged: 2018-05-24 23:22:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6170725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Irritated_Fern/pseuds/Irritated_Fern
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A boy and tiger go to Mount Ebott, where it is said no one has returned from.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

> Uh, hey! This is my first fanfic (Or at least my first published one), so it might start off shakey.

“CALVIN! CAN’T YOUR STEER THIS THING?”

 

In a familiar red wagon, Calvin and Hobbes were once again rushing down the mountainside. Calvin tried to steer it but to no avail. Hobbes, of course, continued yelling.

 

“I knew we shouldn’t have gone up Mount Ebott! There’s a rumor that everyone who goes up the mountain dies, but YOU say “Oh I’m sure it’s just a rumor”! Good call on that one!”

 

“If it helps, I’m pretty sure if we hadn’t taken a wagon down it, we would have been fine!” Calvin yelled back.

 

“THAT DOES NOT HELP IN THE SLIGHTEST!” Hobbes yelled back as the wagon went over a jump, flying through the air.

 

“Okay, will you just calm down?” Calvin yelled as he tried in vain to gain some control over the wagon. He failed, as the wagon crashed down, giving it’s riders quite the shock. The wagon rolled forward, careening to a opening in the ground.

 

“Look out! We’re headed towards that cave!” Hobbes worriedly shouted, before trying to gain some control over the wagon.

 

As they tumbled into the cave, Calvin tried to wrestle control back. “Will you just…” Calvin stopped as he stared ahead. There was a giant chasm right in front of him!

 

“WE’RE GOING TO DIE!”, Hobbes shrieked, while Calvin quickly looked over and saw a narrow passage, potentially a way out-or at least an alternative to the hole on the right.

 

With a jerk, he threw the wagon into the narrow passage, breaking the wagon in the process, and causing the pieces to tumble along with him, crashing into the chasm.

 

“AAAAGGGGHHHH!” Hobbes shouted, as they tumbled down. “Look, I had to stop us from falling down that hole! At least we’re safe…” Calvin stopped, as he realized they were tumbling down into another chasm; not quite as deep, but filled with rocks.

 

Calvin grasped for the wagon handle, trying to flip it around, but only caused to crash down faster. He jumped out, but the slope was pretty steep-he crashed down, and began tumbling even faster. He looked over at Hobbes who was now silent from fear as he desperately clawed at the slope, trying in vain to get back up. Calvin fell off the slope, and began the last fall to the rocks.

 

Calvin began to sweat. As he fell towards a rather pointy stalagmite, he began hyperventilating. He was really going to die, he was really going to die! As he was about to hit the rocks, he wish he had one way, a way to escape death…

 

Then he hit the rock.

 

**LOAD**

 

**\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

 

As they tumbled into the cave, Calvin tried to wrestle control back. “Will you just…” Calvin stopped as he stared ahead. There was a giant chasm right in front of him!

 

Wait, this seemed familiar.

 

“...Hobbes, haven’t we already done this?” 

 

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN “HAVE WE DONE THIS”? I’M FAIRLY CERTAIN WE HAVEN'T DIED BEFORE!”

 

But I did die before, Calvin thought. Why had he gone back? He didn’t understand…

 

“CALVIN, DO SOMETHING!”

 

Right, Calvin still needed to do something. Only, last time, he got them both killed…

 

Calvin turned to Hobbes, and calmly replied: “Hobbes, I think we should just fall down.”

 

Hobbes stared at him, bug-eyed. “HAVE YOU GONE INSANE?”

 

Well, he might have. But hey, it’s not like he had a lot of options.

 

“WHY DID I HANG OUT WITH YOU?!” Hobbes asked as they fell into the oppressive cavern. Down, down, they fell, as doubt began to sweep through Calvin’s mind. He really was insane, they were going to die…

 

Suddenly, they crashed into a surprisingly soft surface, as they fell into a garden of yellow flowers that thankfully broke their fall. Calvin turned to Hobbes.

 

“See, what’d I tell ya?”

  
Hobbes glared at him.


	2. New Freind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So glad people are interested! And if you're wondering what's with the spacing...basically, copy-paste between Google Docs and AO3 is not all that smooth. Anyway, some stories I've seen on Fanfiction.net have this thing were authors respond to comments in the opening author notes. I assume this is allowed here, too; if not, I can remove these.  
> TheBigCat: Glad you like it! I'm not sure how "Copy-Pastey" this will be, in part because I don't really know what you mean. There aren't really any significant deviations in the story, if that's what you mean.  
> writeswithfeatherquills: Uh, should you really be so exited about a story only one chapter in?

It had been ten minutes since they landed, and Calvin and Hobbes had not moved from the spot. Mostly because they were arguing.

 

“YOU WERE GOING TO GET US KILLED! WHY DIDN’T YOU HEAD TOWARDS THAT SIDE PATH? YOU’RE LUCKY WE DIDN’T DIE BECAUSE OF YOU!”

 

“IT WORKED OUT FINE, OKAY? HOW DO YOU KNOW THE SIDE PATH WASN’T FILLED WITH SHARP ROCKS OR SOMETHING?”

 

“THAT WOULD JUST BE RIDICULOUS!”

 

“WHATEVER! WE SURVIVED, DIDN’T WE?”

 

“YES, AND NOW WE’RE STUCK UNDERGROUND WITH NO WAY BACK UP!”

 

“HOW IS THAT MY FAULT?”

 

“IT WAS YOUR IDEA TO CLIMB UP THIS MOUNTAIN IN THE FIRST PLACE!”

 

“WHATEVER, YOU MANGY FLEABAG!”

 

“WHY, I OUGHTA…”

 

* * *

 

“Friends again?”

 

“Friends again.”

 

A badly bruised Calvin and Hobbes shook hands. The argument over, Calvin looked around.

 

“You know, this place is actually kind of nice.” Calvin thought out loud. “It’s peaceful, there’s sunlight reaching down, there’s flowers...really, if this wasn’t inside a cave, it’d be perfect for a picnic. Actually, hang on…” Calvin reached in his pockets and pulled out a couple of sandwiches.

 

“How’d those sandwiches fit in there? And why aren’t they squashed from the fall?” Hobbes asked.

 

“Shut up. Now I asked Mom for tuna and salmon for you, and caramel and jelly beans for mine…”

 

Hobbes licked his lips.

 

“But apparently she messed up, so I have salmon and caramel, and tuna and jelly beans. Which one do you want?”

 

Hobbes stared in disgust at his two options. “I think you can have both. I just lost my appetite.”

 

Calvin wolfed down the salmon/caramel combination, and then stowed away the other.

 

“Okay, so now what?” Calvin looked around.

 

“Right, I almost forgot we’re trapped in a cave.” Hobbes nodded, before they both got up and walked off. It was only a short walk until they found something of note-a gateway made of stone.

 

Hobbes felt it. “Definitely not natural...this was clearly made by someone. But who?”

 

Calvin shrugged. “Only one way to find out”.

 

As they walked into the gateway, they were greeted by a peculiar sight-a flower with a face! It resembled the flowers from the previous room, and was currently waving back and forth, smiling.

 

“Howdy! You’re new to the Underground, aren’t  you?” The flower asked. Despite it’s friendly appearance, it still unsettled Calvin slightly. Hobbes looked just as shaken.

 

“Are...you a talking flower?” Hobbes asked, clearly baffled.

 

The flower gave off a cheeky grin. “Yep! Name’s Flowey! Flowey the Flower! Boy, somebody ought to teach you how things work around here…”

 

Suddenly, Calvin’s heart shone red, emitting a bright glow. It looked very cartoony, yet emitted a certain radiance. Hobbes stared at Calvin in shock, while the flower continued on. “That is your SOUL, the very culmination of your being!”

 

Hobbes looked very confused. “Uh, Calvin, I’m not sure-”

 

Flowey cut him off. “Your soul starts off weak, but can grow strong if you gain a lot of LV!”

 

“LV?” Calvin asked. “What does that stand for?”

 

“Why, LOVE, of course!” Flowey cheerfully said.

 

Of course.

 

Flowey continued on. “You want some LOVE, don’t you?” He asked rhetorically, turning to Calvin.

 

Calvin was much less sure than Flowey was. “Well, I’m not really sure what you mean, and-”

 

“Don’t worry! I’ll share some with you!” He said, before creating a few white pellets magically in the air. “Down here, we share LOVE through little white...friendliness pellets.” He grinned, before firing them at Calvin.  “Move around! Get as many as you can!”

 

Calvin quickly stepped out of the way. He didn’t quite trust the flower, and the “friendliness pellets” seemed more like bullets.

 

The Flower’s freindly expression changed to one of annoyance. “Hey buddy, you missed them. Let’s try that again, shall we?” Again, Flowey shot off bullets, and again, Calvin dodged them.

 

Flowey’s rage became more apparent. “Is this a joke? Are you braindead? RUN. INTO. THE. B̶U̶L̶L̶E̶T̶S̶.̶ friendliness pellets.” He growled, before firing off some more pellets.

 

“Wait, did you just say bullets?” Calvin asked, albeit with a certain smugness in seeing through the flower’s tricks.

 

“Uh, Calvin, I’m pretty sure he said friendliness pellets. They DO look sort of like bullets, though.” As Hobbes talked, Calvin wondered. Flowey DID say friendliness pellets, but somehow still said bullets...regardless, he dodged the attack.

 

Calvin stared at Flowey’s expression-at fist it remained blank, but then it shifted to a more sinister appearance. “You know what’s going on here, don’t you?” Flowey questioned, with a much more sinister tone. Calvin and Hobbes backed away in fear.

 

“You just wanted to see me suffer.” Flowey accused, glaring at the boy. Calvin glared at him back. “You were trying to kill me!” Calvin stated.

 

Suddenly, a ring of bullets appeared, and circled around the duo, cutting off all means of escape. “DIE.” Flowey commanded, before cackling maniacally.

 

As the bullets closed in, Calvin and Hobbes huddled together, trying to delay the inevitible. “Uh, Hobbes sorry I got you into this,” Calvin apologized, looking over at Hobbes. “Don’t be,” Hobbes responded, “I think this one is all on Flowey”.

 

Flowey’s laughter continued, as the bullets closed in. Calvin and Hobbes shivered in terror, watching the bullets close in. Calvin thought about how he died once today-was that just a fluke? Was he immortal? He stared ahead at the devious flower. Even if he did come back, could he get past the flower? There was only one exit in sight, and Flowey was blocking it pretty well. Was this it? Was this the end?

 

Suddenly, a flame appeared besides Flowey. Calvin knew it wasn’t Flowey, for he looked just as confused as Calvin and Hobbes did. The fireball rammed the flower, knocking it aside, sending Flowey into the darkness. Calvin looked over, and saw another peculiar creature.

 

She was clearly female, but also clearly not human. She resembled a nanny goat somewhat, and she stood on two feet, much like Hobbes, but unlike him, she wore clothing-a purple robe, with a strange symbol on it. She looked over Calvin with a warm comforting gaze, making him slightly calmer. She began to speak in a calm, motherly tone.

 

“What a terrible creature, torturing such a poor innocent youth,” she said, looking over Calvin and Hobbes. Hobbes looked skeptically at her. “Uh, thanks for saving us, but...who are you?”

 

The figure chuckled softly. “Do not be afraid, striped ones. I am Toriel, caretaker of the Ruins. Come, I will guide you through these catacombs.” And with that, she walked off, clearly expecting them to follow her; they did, with some hesitance.

 

While they walked, Hobbes quietly talked to Calvin. “Are you sure we can trust her? I mean, she did save us, but Flowey acted friendly too.” He unsure asked to Calvin. Calvin shrugged in response. “Well we don’t know for sure. But, I mean, she could have let Flowey kill us, or swooped in for the finishing blow. I don’t know for sure...but we are in an unfamiliar place. She’s our best option.”

 

Hobbes thought. “Okay...if you think I can trust her, than I guess I will...for now.” He finished, as they walked into the gateway.

 

Calvin looked up in awe. While the other parts of the Underground had been mostly empty and dark, the entrance to the ruins was grand and yet imposing. He stared ahead-Toriel was waiting for them up a pair of flights of stairs.

 

Calvin stopped to think for a moment-he was in a strange place, and he and Hobbes were almost killed-and before they WERE killed. He was trapped in an unfamiliar place, yet at the same time was interested and excited to begin exploring. He felt many emotions swelling up, one in paticular most of all.

 

He was filled with determination.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh geez, this chapter is so much longer than the other. And they just got to the Ruins. This fic is going to be a long runner, isn't it? (Assuming I don't abandon it.)  
> Anyway, I was thinking of making a companion fic, only with Susie and Moe instead of Calvin and Hobbes. Does that seem interesting? I'm going to do it ether way, but should I work on both stories at the same time or finish off that one before starting that one?


	3. First Steps

Calvin and Hobbes continued to follow Toriel through the Ruins. They soon stopped near a closed door. Toriel cleared her throat before beginning to speak.

 

“Now, the Underground works somewhat differently than you might be used to. To progress, you will have to solve puzzles, ancient fusions between diversions and door keys.” She then demonstrated by walking over to some nearby buttons and stepping on a few of them. Calvin idly wondered how she knew which buttons to press.

 

“Do you understand the concept?” Toriel asked, turning to Calvin and Hobbes. They both nodded-while solving puzzles to proceed was a new concept, they were of course familiar with the basic concept of puzzles. “Good! Then follow me.” She said, walking off into a new room.

 

The next room was more open, with a few rivers running through it. “Now, to proceed in this room, you have to press a few switches. Do not worry, I have labeled them for you.”

 

Calvin shrugged. “Seems kind of basic, but sure.” He and Hobbes walked over to the first switch, that sure enough, was next to a label from Toriel asking them to press the switch. Calvin pressed the switch, and then walked over to the next one, with Hobbes following.

 

“She sure doesn’t seem all that confident in us,” Hobbes whispered to Calvin. “I mean, the switches are clearly labeled, yet she’s still watching us like she seriously thinks we might have trouble with it.” Calvin shrugged. “Yeah, she does seem overprotective. Maybe she’s worried Flowey will come back.” As Calvin made it to the next switch, he noticed there were two switches, one that he was supposed to press. “Hm, I wonder…” Calvin tried to press the other switch, but it didn’t even work.

 

“Figures.”

 

Calvin then pulled the other switch, causing the door to the next room to open. “Ah! Yes, very good!” Calvin honestly could not tell if she was giving empty praise or she was seriously impressed. As they followed her into the next room, they did not find a puzzle at all, but was rather a dummy meant for fighting.

 

Toriel began to explain. “Down here in the Ruins, monsters may attack you for being human, as you are strange and unfamiliar to them. You will have to be prepared to deal with them.”

 

Calvin turned to Toriel. “So, are you going to train us to fight or something?” Toriel shook her head. “Oh my, no! Dummies are for talking, not fighting! If a monster attacks you, strike up a friendly conversation! I will come to resolve the conflict. Now, practice talking with the dummy, please.”

 

Somewhat awkwardly, Calvin walked over to the dummy, staring at it, Hobbes at his side. Suddenly, his heart shone red once again.

 

“Um…” Calvin stared at his soul. Last time it shone like this, it didn’t go so well. But he was supposed to be preparing for conflict-would this now happen regularly? For now, he looked at the dummy, but found himself at a loss for words.

 

“...Aren’t you going to talk to it?” Hobbes quietly asked. “What am I supposed to say? It’s an inanimate object!” Calvin whispered back. “I dunno, ask about the weather?” Hobbes suggested. Calvin groaned. “Hobbes we’re in a cave! There’s no weather here!” Hobbes growled. “Look, if you don’t like my suggestion, figure it out yourself!” Calvin glared. “Fine!” Calvin turned to the dummy. He stared at it for a bit, still trying to think of what to say.

 

Then it floated away.

 

Calvin and Hobbes stared at the spot where the dummy was for a bit. Toriel stared at them,  not expecting that to happen. Finally, she broke the silence. “Let us head to the next room,” she gestured, acting like nothing unusual had happened. Calvin and Hobbes followed suit, silently agreeing to never mention this again.

 

As they walked into the next room, they saw a lighter, swerving path of purple. “I wonder if you can figure this puzzle out?” Toriel asked to herself. There did not seem to be a nearby puzzle, however, though Calvin figured that the path was important. As Calvin tried to remember the path, the three walked into the corridor between the room with the odd path and the next, Calvin saw an inscription on the wall.

 

“The east room is the west room’s blueprint...what does that mean? And was that the East or West room?” Calvin turned to Hobbes. “That one was probably the east room-It’s probably the solution to a puzzle in the west room.” Hobbes responded. “Oh, yeah, that makes sense-oh look, a frog.”

 

Calvin and Hobbes had ran into a strange looking frog. It was white, looked more like a cartoon frog than a real one, and strangest of all, had a pair of eyes between it’s legs. All four of it’s eyes were staring at them with a vaguely threatening but mostly confused look.

 

Hobbes stared at it in confusion. “Uhm, is that a frog or-Calvin, your heart!” Calvin turned to his chest, and that strange heart had appeared yet again. Calvin came to a realization. “Wait a minute-this heart only shows up when a monster is attacking. Is that frog going to attack?”

 

Sure enough, the frog, in a similar manner as flowey, gathered some energy together to form an attack. Unlike Flowey’s these formed a more definitive shape- that of a fly. The flies flew at the two, but were easily avoided. Calvin glared at the frog. “All right, pally, stop flinging those flies at us, or you’ll go flying!” It was lame, but it worked-the frog backed up a bit, clearly intimidated. It stood it’s ground, however, and used a second attack-it made a smaller frog, which leaped at Calvin, smacking him in the face. Calvin glared at it. “Okay. now you’re going to get it,” Calvin growled. “TORIEL!” 

 

Toreil, who had went ahead, came back and glared at the frog. It reminded Calvin of all the times his Mom had glared at him-it felt nice to not have it directed at him for once. The frog ashamedly slunk away. Toriel ran over, patting Calvin on the head. “I’m sorry I did not notice that earlier. Are you hurt?” Calvin shrugged. “Not really. It hit me once, but I’m okay.” Toriel nodded. “If you’re sure you’re okay…Let’s continue.”

 

In the next room, there was a large pond, with a bridge covered in spikes. Calvin stared ahead, before nodding. “I get it! That path we saw earlier is the path we need to take! That was easy.” Hobbes nodded. “Yeah, that was pretty easy. But, uh, what is the path? I, er, sort of forgot it.” Hobbes admitted before turning to Calvin, who shook his head. “I forgot it too. The frog sort of distracted me.”

 

“Do you need any help?” Toreil asked the two, noticing their hesitation. Calvin turned to her and nodded. “Yes, please.”

Toriel took Calvin’s hand, and started walking across the bridge, Hobbes following closely behind. As they walked, Calvin noticed the path they took felt quite familiar-he and Hobbes were right about how to solve it, even if they couldn’t remember the actual solution.

 

Soon, they reached the other side, before crossing into the next room. There, Toriel looked guiltily at the two. “I’m afraid I have a difficult request of you two. I’m afraid you will have to cross through this room alone.” She than ran off, leaving Calvin and Hobbes behind.

 

“Um...why’d she leave us behind?” Calvin asked. “And why’d she feel so guilty about it? Is there something dangerous in this room?” He asked, hesitantly stepping forward.

 

The two looked around. There didn’t seem to be anything dangerous…”Do you see anything?” Calvin asked as he turned to Hobbes. “I mean, I think it checks out, but, she did seem sorry about it…though, I do have a hard time believing Toriel would put us in real danger.” Hobbes shrugged. “I mean, you have some good points...I guess we should continue for now?”

 

The two walked forward, looking around. “See anything?” Hobbes whispered to Calvin. Calvin shook his head. “I don’t see anything...it does seem like a harmless corridor.” As they walked, they saw a pillar-although not that suspicious on it’s own, it did seem out of place, being white compared to the purple of the rest of the room and having no counterparts.

 

“Well, that’s not suspicious or anything.” Hobbes snarked. Calvin stared at it. “It doesn’t seem like a trap or anything...let’s just leave it for now.” As they walked past it, Toriel ran out from behind it, revealing both herself and the purpose of the pillar. “Greetings, young ones. Do not worry, I did not leave you. I was merely hiding behind the pillar the whole time.”

 

Calvin stared at her. “So, uh...what was the point of that?” Calvin turned to her. “The reason for this exercise was to test your independence. For you see...I will have to leave you in here for a while.” Toriel summarized the situation, looking regretful. However, an idea suddenly struck her, causing her face to brighten. “I have an idea! I shall give you a cell phone!”

 

She dug a cell phone out of a hidden pocket in her robes, handing it to Calvin. Calvin stared at in awe-it was outdated, to be sure, but he had never had anything of the sort. “Wow..thanks!” Calvin smiled, thanking Toriel. She thanked him back, before slowly walking off into the next room, Calvin and Hobbes waving goodbye.

 

When she left, Calvin and Hobbes stood around, looking around awkwardly.

 

“Uh...want to play eye spy?” Hobbes asked, turning to Calvin.

  
Calvin sighed.  



	4. Follow The Purple Brick Road

“I spy...something purple!”

“It’s the walls, Hobbes.”

“Well played...but now I see something that starts with the letter P!”

Calvin sighed. They had been doing this for the past five minutes. “It’s the pillar, Hobbes.”

Hobbes grinned. “Nope!”

“Is it “Purple walls”, then?”

“Nope!” Hobbes poked Calvin. “It’s “Punk!””

Calvin glared at Hobbes. “This is stupid! You’ve used me, the pillar, and the walls several times each, as well as using yourself twice-which doesn’t even make sense, by the way-and I’ve had enough. Let’s just go follow Toriel.”

Hobbes looked unsure. “Didn’t she say to stay here?”

“I am NOT playing any more “I spy”. Come on.” Hobbes shrugged. “Fine. But I was totally winning.”

As they walked into the next room, they happened upon another strange white frog. Calvin stepped back, but this one seemed to be docile, as well as less confused. “Um...hello?”

“I have heard you are quite merciful for a human. Sometimes, when fighting a monster, if you hurt it enough or ACT a certain way, it may not want to fight. If so, please, have mercy on it.”

Hm. That was almost the same thing Toriel taught him, although now he would have to resolve the conflict without her intervention. Hopefully that wouldn’t be too hard. He nodded at the frog, before he and Hobbes continued on their way.

As they walked down the bend, a monster flew up to them, softly shivering. Calvin’s heart shone red again, as the monster stared them down. It looked somewhat like a moth, but it was a lot more hairy, and was looking apologetically at him.

“Another one? Why do almost all these monsters want to attack us?” Hobbes growled, preparing to pounce, but Calvin signaled for him to stop. “Now, I don’t know why you want to attack us, but I’m sure we can reach some sort of-”

The month immediately started crying. “I’M SORRY! I’M SORRY!” They yelled out, flying away. Calvin’s heart returned to normal, Calvin staring ahead. “Well, that was easy.”

As they walked forward, Calvin noticed something. “Hey, I think it dropped these.” Calvin reached down, picking up a few golden coins. “Looks like money. I think the moth-thing dropped it.” Calvin showed the coins to Hobbes. “Oooh, gold!...think we should return it to the moth thing?” Calvin shook his head. “He’d probably run away again. Let’s just continue on.”

As they continued on, they found what looked somewhat like a laundry chute. Calvin stared at it. “Where do you think it goes? What purpose does it serve?” Hobbes picked up a rock by his feet and threw it in the chute. It made clattering sounds as it fell towards the bottom. Besides that, nothing seemed to happen.

Calvin and Hobbes stared at it, before turning. The path ahead as somewhat cracked and unstable. Hobbes hesitated. “Are you sure it’s safe?” Calvin shrugged. “Well, it's either this or the chute. But, uh...why don’t you go first?” Hobbes shook his head. “No way! You do it!” Hobbes shoved Calvin towards the cracks.

Calvin grumbled, before walking forward. As he stepped on the cracked ground, it started to crumble! He tried to jump, but he was not fast enough, and he fell down. Fortunately, it was not a long drop, and a pile of red leaves broke his fall. Hobbes stared down at him with a smug grin. “Hah! Told you it was unsafe!”

Calvin grumbled, before getting up and looking around. There were two doorways, and one had a rock in front of it. Calvin walked over to it, picking it up. Looking it over, he noticed it was the same rock as the one Hobbes threw down the chute. If this doorway connected to the chute they threw the rock in…

* * *

Calvin tumbled out of another chute. He got up, looking around. On the other side was Hobbes, and in between then was the crumbly ground he fell through. Hobbes stared at Calvin across the gap. “You made it across?” Calvin nodded. “Yeah, there’s a way up. You just have to fall in!”

Rather than do that, Hobbes backed up before he took a running start. Running as fast as he could, he did a spiraling jump over the crumbly path, before landing with an impressive pose. Calvin grumbled. ”Show off…” Hobbes grinned.

The next room had a rock, a button, and a row of spikes. Calvin and Hobbes jumped over the spikes.

“Seems like there should be a puzzle there…” Hobbes wondered.

“Eh, it was probably just pushing the rock.”

As they walked into the next room, they walked into what looked like a line of jello molds, all three wiggling. Calvin’s heart turned red again, (strange how something so bizarre had become normal for him) as they opened by firing balls of energy. They two found it easy to sidestep them, but were caught off guard by the energy balls splitting apart, grazing their sides. Calvin shot a mean look at the three molds. “Alright, you brainless lumps, you'd better leave before we pound you!”

To Calvin’s surprize, the molds listened, all three scurrying off in different directions. Similar to the moth thing, they left behind some gold coins, which the duo helped themselves to. After that little scuffle, they looked ahead to see another cracked path, although this seemed a lot bigger.

“Uh, should we just fall in again?” Calvin asked. Hobbes shrugged, as the two walked forward. When they walked forward, the ground Calvin was on once again became crumbly as he fell-but the floor Hobbes was on stayed stable. Once again, Calvin fell on leaves, as he moaned about how he was the only one to fall again.

“Hey...there aren’t any leaves below you.” Calvin noted, noticing the lack of leaves in part of the room-the same part Hobbes was standing above with no issue. “I get it...the leaves mark places that are unsafe! It’s like that spike bridge earlier-you memorize the path!”

“That’s good, Calvin...but how will I know the path?” Calvin grinned. “You have to fall down here, of course!” Hobbes growled at him. “Or I could just lead you…”

After going up another chute to get back up and leading Hobbes across the cracked ground, they came across a room similar to the room they were in a bit earlier-three rocks, three buttons, and two rows of spikes.

Calvin turned to Hobbes. “You think we can get across?” Hobbes shook his head. “Maybe...better not risk it. Let’s just solve the puzzle.”

They split up and each pushed a rock onto a switch, Calvin groaning about the grunt work.

“Shut up, this is easy stuff.” Hobbes walked over to the third rock and began to push it; However, it would not budge. Calvin grinned. “Not so easy, is it?” Hobbes groaned. “Urgh...why won't this rock move?”

“Hey, it’s not like I’m pushing you around!” The rock yelled at Hobbes.

While Hobbes recoiled, Calvin was used to all the strangeness by now, and walked over to the rock. It at least wasn’t hostile. “Look, if you don’t want to be pushed, do you mind just moving?”

“Hm...yeah, I can do that.” The rock slid forward a bit. “...A bit more?” Calvin asked. The rock slid to the right.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Oh, I getcha.” The rock moved onto the switch. Calvin nodded to the rock as they walked to the bridge. “See, Hobbes. We didn’t need to do brute-”  
The spikes shot back up. Calvin turned to look at the rock, which had slid off the button. “Oh, you wanted me to stay there, didn’t you?” As the rock slid back on the button, Calvin shook his head. “What is wrong with the minerals of today…”

As they wandered into the next room, they saw a piece of cheese on the table. Calvin tried to pick it up, but it was stuck to the table. Meanwhile, Hobbes had wandered over to a mousehole. “I wonder why the mouse hasn’t left the hole.”

Calvin thought for a moment. “Well, maybe the mouse is afraid. Sometimes, we stay still, and we fall into a pattern, even though better is right in front of us. Sometimes, what we need is a push, whether from the person themselves, someone they know, or even random chance. Whatever the reason, the push shall come, and we stall find ourselves enriched in new experiences...that push-the thought of that mouse reaching the cheese-that thought of the push coming for somebody new...it fills me with determination.”

Hobbes stared at Calvin. “I know you like to be philosophical sometimes, but you’re reflecting on CHEESE.”


	5. Guilt And Disgust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter semmed kind of short, but it's been a while between updates.

In the next room, the duo found the way blocked by what looked to be a cartoonish ghost laying down.

 

“zzzzz”, the ghost said. “zzzzz” The ghost kept on saying “z” over again, pretending to sleep. “...We can see your eyes open, you know.” Hobbes pointed out.

 

“oh no…” The ghost sadly murmured. Then, after an awkward silence: “zzzzzzz”

 

“Okay, this is ridiculous. If you aren’t going to fight us, get out of the way.” Calvin commanded. No dice. “Zzzzz” it said, yet again.

 

“i guess we’ll have to force him.” Hobbes walked over to the ghost and took a swipe at it. “oh...i guess i have to...sorry…” the ghost mumbled, slowly rising up.

 

**Guilty Ghost: Napstablook**

 

The ghost’s opening act was to cry bullets shaped like tears, which flew towards Calvin and Hobbes. The two shimmied out of the way, although Calvin got hit once. Shrugging off the pain, he started to talk to the ghost. “Come on, you clearly don’t want to fight us. Can’t you just stop?”

 

The ghost sighed. “oh...i messed up again...oh…” It cried out some more bullets, although these looked more like squiggly lines. These crawled all around, flying all around, hitting them a few times.

 

Undeterred, Calvin continues to talk to the ghost. “Aw, come on, that was a good attack! You can do some things right! You aren’t bad at all!” Hobbes looked confused. “Did you just compliment him on being good at attacking us?”

 

While the tactic was unorthodox, it seemed to work, as the ghost smiled for a second. However, this was short lived, as they soon returned to frowning. Instead of attacking, they instead made a message out of grey bullets-”really not feeling up to it right now. sorry.” 

 

Calvin smiled at the ghost. “Oh, but you were doing such a good job! Come on, do you have anything else?”

 

The ghost thought for a moment. “actually…” The ghost cried more bullet-tears, but these flew up and formed what looked like a top hat on his head. “...do you like it?”

 

Calvin clapped enthusiastically, while Hobbes hesitantly gave a thumbs up. “oh, gee…”

 

Calvin’s heart turned to normal, as the battle drew to a close. “you know, i normally come here because there’s hardly anyone here...but you guys are nice. oh...my name’s napstablook...if you wanted to know…”

 

The ghost faded out, vanishing from sight. Calvin smiled. “And so, with a little kindness, a lost soul passes to the other side…” Calvin narated.

 

They both stood in silent complication. Finally, Hobbes spoke up. “I just realized something.”

 

Calvin turned to his friend. “Yes?”

 

“That ghost’s name was Napstablook, and what was he doing? Naping to block us! Get it?” Hobbes grinned.

 

Calvin sighed. “Way to ruin reflecting on the circle of life with puns, Hobbes. This is the second time you've done this.”

 

* * *

There was a split in the path-one going forward, and the other veering to the left. “Uh, what way do we go?” Hobbes asked, turning to Calvin. “You got a coin?” Calvin fumbled through his pockets, pulling out one of the gold coins.

 

“Okay, heads we go straight ahead, tails we go to the left.” Calvin flipped the coin, the gold piece flying through the air, as it hit the ground. “So what is it?” Hobbes asked, as Calvin picked it up. “It’s uh...a heart?...In hindsight, we probably should have checked the coin before flipping it.”

 

“...Yeah, that would have been smart. But, uh, it’s not a face, right? It should be tails, then.”

 

Calvin frowned. “There’s not a face on the other side, either. There’s, um...actually. This is the symbol on Toriel’s robes.” He showed it to Hobbes, who took the coin and looked it over. “That’s weird. I guess it must be an important symbol, if it’s on the currency.”

 

“That makes sense, I guess. But is it heads or tails? How do we decide that?”

 

“We could flip a coin.”

 

Hobbes face-palmed.

 

* * *

 

In the end, they decided to go ahead, a decision they were currently regretting. The room they were in was a dead end, with only a few spider webs. “Stupid coin. No wonder we don’t use gold as a currency anymore.” Calvin said, scowling.

 

Hobbes walked over to a spiderweb, pulling a piece of paper out. “...Spider bake sale? Calvin, can you come over here?”

 

Calvin walked over, looking at the paper. “It says you can leave money in the web, and then spiders will bring you food. Should we try it?” Calvin shrugged. “Why the heck not.”

 

As Calvin left the coins in the web, a swarm of spiders crawled out of a crack in the wall. Calvin and Hobbes reflexively flinched, but the spiders simply picked up the coins and crawled away with them. Soon, more spiders came, leaving a doughnut in the web. Calvin picked it up out of the web, brushing it off.

 

Calvin stared at it. “What’s it made out of?” Hobbes checked the flier. “Food made by spiders, for spiders, ...of spiders.”

 

Calvin stared at it. “I’m not sure what’s more disgusting-the fact that this doughnut is made out of spiders, or that spiders are willing to kill their own kind for a bake sale.”

 

“Don’t forget the fact they apparently regularly cannibalize their brethren.”

 

“Also, this is a jelly doughnut.”

  
“Now that’s REALLY messed up. Who likes jelly doughnuts?”


	6. The day of All the Purple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe if I don't say anything, people won't notice the update gap...

After turning back and heading the other way, they happened upon another corridor. This corridor happened to have two of those white frogs. Calvin walked over to the first frog. 

“...You’re a human, aren’t you?”

Calvin nodded. “Oh. You know, they say pressing F4 can project what’s on your monitor...but what does F4 mean? Does it stand for four frogs? I have only seen a maximum of three frogs in this room...this is troubling.”

Calvin looked around. “The third one isn’t always here, you know.” The frog explained. Calvin nodded. “Oh, no, I completely understand the number of frogs in a room may vary. It’s just...I completely don’t understand everything else you’re saying.”

“You don’t know what a monitor is?”

“Yes, I know what those are. I just don’t see how that at all relates to our current situation.”

“Hey, I think it’s useful. You can’t judge my opinion.”

“Even when it’s based on outright lies?”

“Especially then.”

“Oh, of course not. That could lead to horrors like civil debates. What a nightmare.”

Hobbes walked up to Calvin and the frog. “Are we going to continue, or are you going to pointlessly debate with an amphibian?”

“...do I have a choice?”

“Let’s go.”

* * *

The next room had it’s exit blocked by a cluster of spikes. “Geez, it’s always spikes, isn’t it?” Calvin said, staring disdainfully at the spikes. “Why not mix it up? A moat, a guard, a fence, machine guns…”

“Calvin, this was built long before machine guns were a thing.”

“I’m just saying-WAUGH!”

“You’re saying WAUGH?...Oh, you fell down another pit, didn’t you?”

Calvin grumbled from below. “You know, it’s hard to tell if the crumbly ground is intentional or part of the puzzle.”

Hobbes shrugged. “Who knows? Okay, we can split up and search for a switch or something.”

* * *

“I suppose this qualifies as something” Hobbes said, fingering the red ribbon. “I wonder if it has a use...eh, might as well take it.”

* * *

“Is this a carrot or something?” Calvin asked, tugging at a strange lump of greenery. Suddenly, it popped out of the ground, wearing a maniacal grin. Calvin sighed. “Of course. Let’s get it on, then.”

As the two faced each other, the monster carrot started to speak. “Farmed locally...very locally.” He then began spitting out a variety of bullets shaped like veggies, bouncing all over the place. Calvin ducked down, avoiding an approaching onion. However, he failed to notice a corncob flying behind him; the cob ended up striking him in the head. “Geez, you’re like Flowey. Can you go?”

The carrot cackled. “Silly human, I’m here for your health. You need to eat your greens.” All of a sudden, carrot-shaped bullets began raining down from the ceiling. Calvin grumbled, stepping out of the way of the various projectiles. “Yeah, I’m not buying that.” As he scampered out of the way, he looked up. “Hey, is one of those carrots green?” 

Indeed, one of the carrots was green, quite a standout from all the while ones. “I wonder…” Experimentally, he let one hit him, bracing for impact. To his surprise, instead of hurting, the bullet coursed through him, revitalizing him. “Huh. You were right, I should eat my greens. So...thanks I guess.” Calvin chose to ignore the proportion of healing bullets to regular, harming bullets.

The carrot cackled, before hopping upstairs. Calvin shrugged, before walking up after him.

* * *

“AUGH!” Hobbes cried, tumbling down into another hole. “Geez, that’s so annoying. Why would anyone want these holes here?”  
“oh...yeah, these holes are worthless...i just hang out in them sometimes...” A familiar ghost mumbled. Hobbes turned excitedly towards him. “Hey, you aren’t dead! Now I don’t feel bad about cracking jokes at your passing.” Napstablook looked ashamed. “oh...sorry i’m not dead…” Napstablook let out, guiltily looking away. Hobbes shook his head. “No! You being alive is a GOOD thing! No suicide!” Hobbes shouted. This seemed to pacify Napstablook a little, but he didn’t respond. Hobbes looked around awkwardly, staring at the walls..

To break the ice, Hobbes pulled out a ribbon. “I found this ribbon...do you want it?” Napstablook turned over, staring at it for a bit. “um...i can’t accept that.” Napstablook muttered, looking guilty. “Oh, come on! Sure you can! It’s a gift!” Hobbes retorted.

“...no, i’m intangible. i literally can’t.”

In hindsight, that should have been pretty obvious.

Napstablook continued. “but, uh...i can’t use it, but i bet if you or your friend wore it, you’d be cuter...monsters won’t hit you as hard if you’re cute, you know.” Hobbes thought about it for a second. He didn’t need it of course, but Calvin was more squishy, so he could use it. Plus, it’d just be priceless if he actually got him to wear it. He could hear Calvin’s screams now…

Hobbes chuckled. “Thanks, Napy. You’re the best.”

* * *

Calvin shuddered. “Ugh...that was weird. I just felt a sudden bad omen...ah well. I just found the switch, so there’s that.” Calvin reached over, flipping the switch. “That took an absurd amount of time for such an easy puzzle.” He shrugged, before walking back up the steps.

* * *

The first thing Hobbes noticed when he climbed back up was that the spikes were gone. The second thing he noticed was Calvin’s smug grin. “I did it!” Calvin bragged. “I solved the puzzle AND found out that green attacks heal you!” Hobbes rolled his eyes. “Yeah yeah.” Calvin snorted. “What, did you find something? Bet it wasn’t as impressive.”

Hobbes pulled out the faded ribbon. “I found this. Apparently, if you wear this, you’ll be so cute monsters won’t hit you as hard. C’mon, put it on.”

Calvin stared at Hobbes. “You realize I’m not actually going to wear this, right?”

* * *

“Stupid fleabag. Calvin grumbled, walking into the next room. Hobbes was following behind him, grinning cheekily. “My, it works wonders...all the claw marks are lessening the effect, though. Shame you’re so uncooperative.” 

“Bite me.” Calvin grumbled. After a second, he glared at Hobbes. “Not literally, you furball.” Hobbes grinned innocently.

Still grimacing, Calvin looked around. The room was a rather odd shape, looking somewhat like an L. Scattered around the room were three switches of varying colors, as well as a sign.

“The next door is not an exit; it simply marks a change in perspective.” Calvin stared at the sign, reading it aloud. “Well, that’s weird. Hobbes, do you get it?” Hobbes didn’t answer. Calvin sighed. “You’ve wandered off, haven’t you?” Calvin turned around; Hobbes was not there. Calvin was not surprised. “What a shock. Where’s he now?”

Suddenly, a loud growl emanated from the next room. “Well, that was easy.” Calvin ran off.

* * *

Hobbes hissed, staring at his foes. The one on the left, some sort of cyclops, was currently alternating between asking Hobbes to not pick on him and shooting energy blasts out of it’s eyes. The other, a giant bug of some kind, was much more consistent, commanding a swarm of bugs and shouting mad ravings about some kind of legion.

As another round of combat started, a variety of bugs started buzzing on each side of Hobbes, cutting off his movements. The cyclops joined in, shooting strange rings at Hobbes. The rings came careening towards Hobbes, bouncing off the walls. Hobbes tried to step out of the way, but ended up crashing into the wall of bugs. The bugs stinged, as Hobbes recognized these as bullets rather than real bugs.

Growling, Hobbes rushed towards the cyclops. The cyclops used another attack-firing off a series of connected rings- but Hobbes jumped out of the way of the attack. He then did a midair kick, bouncing off the cyclops before landing back on the ground. 

Snarling, Hobbes roared. The cyclops fidgeted around, badly bruised. Hobbes glared at it threateningly, and pounced. Fleeing, the cyclops dashed out of the room, jumping over the spikes as it ran. As he landed, Hobbes got up, brushing himself off.

“Now for the next one…”

* * *

“Boy, I love bein’ me!” The bug grinned, shaking his arms. “This is a dance of individuality!” The bug did a midair backflip, before landing and shuffling about. Calvin grinned as he watched it. “Hey, this guy’s pretty cool. I can respect individualism. Wonder how Hobbes is doing?” As if on cue, Hobbes performed a diving tackle, crashing into the room. “I’d comment on the irony, but honestly, I’m just wondering what’s with the dramatic entrance.”

“Look, I was fighting a cyclops thing, okay? Also, heads up, there’s still a hostile bug monster in here, so, uh, look out for that.”  
Calvin looked around. “Really? I see a bug monster, but he’s nice. Look, he’s dancing.” Calvin directed Hobbes to it. “See? Isn’t he groovy?”

Hobbes stared, dumbfounded. “But- but he was attacking me! And he had all these evil bullets, and was commanding a swarm and was in a hive mind or something, AND HE CERTAINLY DID NOT DANCE!”

Calvin shook his head. “Really, Hobbes? Wow, what a silly lie. Who’d ever believe that?”

“But...but...fine, let’s go.” Hobbes sighed.

Secretly, Calvin did believe Hobbes. He was just getting back at him for the ribbon.

* * *

“So, uh, what is the puzzle here?” Hobbes asked, looking around.

Calvin checked the sign. “Says here we press the blue switch. You see a blue switch?”

“Yeah, it’s right behind this pillar.” Hobbes pressed down on the button. After he pushed it, a rumbling sound echoed through the halls.

Calvin walked over to the exit. “There we go, now we can walk through here.” He paused. “Well I don’t know if the exit was actually blocked before you pressed it, but knowing this place…” Calvin turned to Hobbes. “Wait, did we even know there was a puzzle in here?” Calvin asked.

“I dunno, I guess we were just used to doing them. I guess we catch on quick.”

Calvin snorted. “I’m sure miss Wormwood disagrees.”

 

“Let’s see here; it says “press the green switch”...wait, didn’t we already do this?”

Hobbes shrugged. “Eh, less work for us, I guess.”

“Guess you’re right.” Calvin said, walking over to the green switch. “I still think this place is a dump.”

With a halfhearted push, Calvin shoved the green button, causing a deep rumbling to echo through the room. WIth a shrug, Calvin walked away, only to hear Hobbes clearing his throat. “Yes?”

“Hey, Calvin? Can I ask you a question?”

Calvin shrugged. “Sure.”

Hobbes nodded. “Well...it’s just that you’ve been remarkably nonchalant about all this. We’ve only been in here a short while, but already you’ve been adapting so quickly…”

Calvin thought about what Hobbes said. “Well...here, let’s keep going. I can fill you in while we walk.”

 

“I suppose maybe I’m just used to all the strange stuff. I’ve dealt with aliens, evil snowmen, creatures under my bed, and Susie. I’m just used to strange things.”

Hobbes pushed down on a red button. “Yeah, I can understand that. That’s why I’m so calm about the situation. But it’s not just that. You’ve embraced this; I think you’re more friendly to monsters than you are humans.”

Calvin stopped walking. He certainly HAD been adapting much better than he thought he would. “Well...I don’t know for sure, but I might have an idea. Come on, Hobbes.”

As the two walked through the door, Calvin continued talking. “I think the reason I’ve been fitting in so well it's because of the unfamiliarity. It’s all so strange and different, but I’ve wanted that all my life. I suppose you could say I’m an adventurer at heart.”

“I always thought that was recklessness.”

“Har har.”

* * *

“I don’t think this is the right way, Calvin.” Hobbes stated, staring below the cliff. “It certainly is a nice view, though.”

Calvin nodded. Looking down, he saw a variety of buildings, all a familiar purple color. “It certainly is impressive. I wonder how big this place is?”

Hobbes looked around. “I’m not sure. I don’t think it really matters, though; most of them seem empty.”

“Yeah...wonder where everyone went?” Calvin asked. “I mean, Toriel did call this place the ruins, but there’s still some monsters here. Not many, but it definitely wasn’t abandoned.”

The two stood in silence for a while.

“Wait...Calvin, look over here.” Calvin turned to Hobbes. “I found something.”

Hobbes held out what looked to be a knife. Calvin’s eyes widened in surprise.

“You found a knife?! That’s so cool! Can I have it?”

“Don’t get your hopes up. This is plastic.” Calvin let out a sigh. “Do you want it anyway?”

Nodding, Calvin was handed the knife by Hobbes. Holding it, he looked it over. “Seems kind of like it was made by humans. Are there other humans down here?”

“Eh, probably not. You’re probably reading too deep into things.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”


End file.
